The Art of Going Slow

What should you do when a meditation technique is difficult for you? Or anything in life, what should you do?

The answer to this question depends on why you're doing the technique, and how you’re thinking about it.

If you're trying to force yourself for whatever reason, then you're starting off on the wrong foot.

If you're embracing curiosity and gently challenging yourself, then that's a better place to start.

I’ve had the good fortune to have a lot of Tibetan neighbors and friends over the years. I’ve learned a lot from them, the most important lesson that I’m still working on integrating is the art of going slow.

Tibetan’s say “goodbye” by telling you to either go slow, or stay slow. Depending on whether you’re the one leaving or staying. You see this slowness through much of their activity. But don’t confuse slow with lazy or ineffective.

In fact it was seeing how much more productive and effective they were that caused me to take note. I try and apply this in my work, my hobbies, and definitely my meditation practice.

This is an actual skill. Being able to pace yourself, to recognize when you need to step away. Maybe take a break or have some tea, and then get back at it…It’s powerful to use this approach.

For me, some meditation techniques that started off as difficult, or even unpleasant, then turned out to be among my favorites. But this only shifted because I allowed myself to keep trying without trying to pressure myself.

In meditation, we're creating new neural pathways. You can't force the brain to do that faster. One we have established those new pathways, the activity associated with the new paths becomes easier. In this case, the meditation technique becomes easier.

I read a book recently that suggested that you must be in a state of heightened tension to focus and learn new things. I cringed and felt sad that people were going to believe this.

What's actually true is that we learn things better when there's emotion attached to what we're learning. But that emotion doesn't need to have a feeling of tension linked to it. 

We can approach things with delight, with joy, and learn new things. Gentle repetition is a more sustainable way to change the brain than anxiety and the kind of exertion that leaves us depleted.

So if you’re trying to learn a new technique, approach it with gentle curiosity. Give it enough time to see what it feels like when our minds have created the new pathways. 

You'll enjoy the journey more, and create associations with whatever you’re learning that enhance your experience, rather than feeling like drudgery.

If you notice yourself becoming tense, shift into that gently energy of curiosity, and see how how much better things go.