Lauren Bear

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That Time When the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu Disagreed

A friend had the wisdom to point out that I am, by nature, into both the scientific and the mystical aspects of meditation and everything around it. I really dig that science is beginning to catch up with what traditional teachers have been saying for ages. Mind over matter is my jam!

I’ve got a primarily Buddhist and Taoist approach to the spiritual side of it, but other traditions appreciate the same things, sometime with different terms. So sometimes there’s a little influence from other mystical or scientific traditions.

The science part is very exciting because it helps us understand how we can get the most out of meditation and what to do to reach different goals. Being able to fine tune our approach is amazing!

I’m fortunate enough to have friends and students who send me links, articles, and information on various teachers. I find the best stuff this way. One of the things that really interests me is how to go deep into a topic, how to gain mastery. Looking at information from various authors on topics around this is fascinating, from a cultural perspective as well as a way to hone these skills.

Because some of these authors tend to be men who don’t have much familiarity with Eastern Philosophy, we often diverge in our approaches.

Here’s an example from another area, there’s the Book of Joy by the HRH the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu. They had a small disagreement about changing the brain. Desmond Tutu commented that we have our nature, and our emotions, and of course we can’t change those things. The Dalai Lama’s reaction was along the lines of “of course we can change those things, that’s what it’s all about”. I’m paraphrasing a little.

That is a most noteworthy difference between Eastern and Western teachings, in my opinion. You always find someone who’ll argue that deep down all spiritual traditions are saying the same thing. I absolutely disagree. Yes, we all have the concepts of morality, and being kind to each other. But that responsibility for our own thoughts and an awareness of how to change our brain is not a universal thing. Since that’s pretty much the foundation of Buddhism, that makes it a pretty big deal.

You’ll find that awareness of our ability to change how we think, how we respond to things, and how much suffering we cause ourselves to be increasing in the West. There’s still a lot of catching up to do.

So when I’m reading these books from a Western cultural viewpoint, I sometimes laugh and shake my head.

For example, there’s a book on doing deep work. By deep work, they mean being really focused on what you’re doing so you can go deep, and there is also an element of gaining mastery in the intention of the advice.

There’s another book on becoming really skillful at something. Mastery again, I love the pursuit of mastery. This author’s research is where we got the idea of 10,000 hours of practice to become really great at a skill. The author, Anders Ericsson, talks about how you can’t just put in the hours. You have to be focused, paying attention, and a good teacher is a big help. He and I diverge on some of the details.

So you might be asking what I object to in these author’s writings and approaches. Let’s talk about martial arts for a moment. The exercise and fighting are very Yang. You’ve probably heard of Yin and Yang before. Without getting too hung up on the gender aspects of this, think of it from more of an archetype standpoint.

Yang is considered masculine. Toxic masculinity is imbalanced Yang. Yang includes things like heat, high energy, rushing, bright lights, and being aggressive. The sun is Yang, so is most exercise, and loud music. When balanced with Yin, then it’s good. Just like Yin balanced with Yang. Balance is everything.

Western culture tries to exist in a very Yang and imbalanced way. In martial arts, the Yang is balanced through practices of gentle exercise like Qi Gong, and especially through meditation. When people try and do bio-hacks to speed up things like meditation and squeeze the most out of it, they’re undermining the essential Yin of it.

Yin is slow, dark, it’s the moon. Yin is healing, recovery, and cool temperatures. Yin is stillness and contemplation, reflection and precision. Yin is feminine. You can see how this would be the perfect compliment for Yang.

So that’s the heart of where I disagree with a lot of authors. Coming from a Western culture, they’re already at a disadvantage, because this Yang imbalance is everywhere. It’s the patriarchy, it’s the glass ceiling, it’s this desire to hurry and have more.

When we try and achieve the benefits of Yin, through force and Yang, we are challenging the very physics of balance. You’ll never make ice cubes in an oven. You can’t achieve something that requires time by hurrying. To achieve mastery, to go deep, we need to embrace the Yin.

We all have Yin AND Yang, but our Yin is often suppressed and undervalued. By unleashing the Tao of Yin, the way of Yin, we can begin to tap into our own true power, our own healing, and our own balance.

Don’t be afraid to go slow, to be deliberate, and to achieve mastery.

*typos and errors provided for your entertainment.